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As a teenager, I subscribed to the notion that one should "retire" (read: celebrate life) in his twenties so he could learn from the world less encumbered by material trappings and only then should he settle in to adulthood. The world may be a more compassionate place. This, I believe, is true luxury. I am now in my forties.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

4 Bike Rules

Attention Biking Newbies:  This is a tribute to the new bike share.  Here are the basic 4 rules and guidelines to traverse the roads of NYC and Brooklyn.  Despite the despondent motorist claims that bikes are taking over the road, this just takes another fraction of the roads back to non-motorized vehicles and maybe slows life down while speeding up those last minute necessary short trips.  Bikes are always the shortest time.  The slowness I am looking for is the heightened, real time awareness of all the senses while temporarily disconnected and not enclosed in a glass/metal isolation box, whether be it office or car.  So, allow me this digression and maybe you will survive:

A.  Disconnect. Temporarily turn off, unplug the headphones from your ears so all of your senses are being used to be completely proactive.  While, in my opinion, biking is extremely enjoyable, it is by know means a joyride.  Consider it more a real-life game of Frogger.  There are multiple hazards.

B. Lock it.  They get stolen.  I have had two of them stolen.

C. Watch for Parked Car Doors Opening.  They open without warning.  Passenger doors are worse because they never look in the side view mirror.   It is a quick way to go over the handlebars. 

D. Stereotype cars.  Yes, I believe stereotypes are appropriate for cycling.  There is no time or ability to gaze in the eyes of a motorist to determine his or her level of awareness to the surroundings and bikes, though thankfully less and less, are not on the priority list.  This is my short list, but feel free to create your own, and I am listing them from most to least dangerous:

ALWAYS USE CAUTION
1. Minivans.  Either driven by moms with multiple children who are invariably distracted or by the religiously devout that can't, and therefore are unable to, acknowledge your existence even if they are themselves wonderful individuals.  They physically don't see you.  (Read more about brain chemistry and our uncanny ability to use filters, in this case cultural, to only recognize certain things even if they are in our visual spectrum.)  These cars almost always drive erratic.  Always give room and play them with caution.

2. Dollar vans.  They are aggressively looking to pick-up fares and their eyes are only focused on a pedestrian with a hand hailing down a cab.  They will pull over at moments' notice.  Use caution.

3.  Taxi drivers.  See above but if you notice they do have a fare they drive aggressively but are focused on the road.

4.  Sedans.  Are less entitled.  They know their place among other people so have more empathy for the welfare of others and possible consequences to their pockets.  They use blinkers and are deliberate with their directions.  Generally less likely to run the lights.  Play them as cautious but they may surprise you.

AGGRESSIVE DRIVERS
5. Large SUV drivers. They feel they own the road, don't give a fuck about a lowly biker, have multiple blind spots and are invariably aggressive.  Play them that way and they are predictable.  Oh, they never use turn signals.

6. High-End cars.  Again, they are highly entitled but can see more of their surroundings.  They also have enviably good sound proofing of road noise, compounded with state-of-the-art sound systems.  They are aggressive.  Play them that way.  Note with SUVs and luxury vehicles, they will run the red light if it "just" turned from yellow.

7. Accessorized Low-End Cars.  Aggressive.  You can often hear their mufflers.  Conversely to the previous entry, they are insulated from exterior noise by their own car sounds.


CAUTIOUS DRIVERS

8.  Economy and Hybrids.  Often too cautious because they are overly concerned either with the dent an accident could have on their wallets or the plight of our crumbling environment, respectively.  They are annoyingly deliberate with their signals; sometimes you can pass them in the process of turning.  Play as cautious and if you are approaching a changing light and they are as well, run the light.  You will be fine!